On the extremely slim chance that someone has been following this dead blog for the past two-ish years, I've moved. First, I moved to sisterbonney.blogspot.com which chronicled my mission adventures in the Korea Busan Mission. I got home from Korea in December and I'm starting fresh. I'm now on theextraordinarymusingsofanordinarygirl.com. I'd love you to join me!
Love,
Sarah
Thursday, February 5, 2015
Monday, April 29, 2013
Not just another mission story
"The following event took place in a Salt Lake City ward in 1974 It occurred during sacrament meeting, and was told by a Regional Representative of the Twelve, who was in the meeting.
A young man, just before leaving on his mission stood in Sacrament Meeting and bore the following testimony:
Brothers and Sisters, as you know during the past few weeks I have been awaiting my mission call. During the time I was waiting, I had a dream. I knew it was not an ordinary dream. I dreamed I was in the pre-existence and was waiting my call to come to Earth.
I was filled with the same excitement and anticipation that I had before I received my mission call. In my dream, I was talking to a friend, he was a dear friend, and I felt a special closeness to him, even though I’ve never met him in this life…
As we talked, a messenger came and gave me a letter, I knew it was my call to go to Earth, in great excitement my friend and I opened the letter. I gave it to him and asked him to read aloud. The letter said:
“You have been called to Earth in a special time and a special land. You will be born into the true church, and you will have the priesthood of God in your home. You will be raised with many advantages and many blessings. You will be born in a land of plenty -a land of freedom. You will go to Earth in the United States of America.”
My friend and I rejoiced as we read my call and while we rejoiced, the messenger returned. This time he had a letter for my friend. We knew it was his call to Earth. My friend gave me the letter to read aloud. His letter said:
“You have been called to Earth in circumstances of poverty and strife. You will not be raised in the true church. Many hardships will attend your life. Your land will be raught with political and social difficulties which will hinder the work of the Lord. You will be born in Costa Rica.”
We wept, my friend and I, as we read his call. And my friend looked at me with tears in his eyes and said, “When we are down on Earth , you in your choice land and me in Costa Rica, my friend, please come and find me.”
"Then this young missionary, with tears in his own eyes said, “Brothers and Sisters, I have received my mission call, I am going to Costa Rica.”
There is a sequel to this story. About a year after the sacrament meeting, the bishop of this ward received a letter from the missionary in Costa Rica. The letter had one sheet of paper in it. And on that sheet, written in inch-high letters where four words……
“I FOUND MY FRIEND”
THIS is why I'm going on a mission. I'm not going for the exotic locations, the foreign experiences, personal development, or even the testimony building. I'm going because I want to share the gospel with others. I want others to have the temporal AND eternal blessings the gospel brings. Because of the Plan of Salvation, after I die, I can have eternal life and return to live with my Heavenly Father. Every one on this earth, who has ever lived or who will live on this earth has this divine potential. However, we must accept the gospel. What's so wonderful is how much Heavenly Father wants His children to accept the gospel. He wants us to return to live with Him! He loves us that much! He has said, "Behold, this is my work and my glory, to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39) Everything He does is meant to help us reach this divine potential. How wonderful that a being as powerful and glorious as Heavenly Father has so much love for us. And with such an individualized love! He doesn't just love the human race; He knows each one of us personally and loves us as individuals! Elder Uchtdorf said, "Even though man is nothing, it fills me with wonder and awe to think that 'the worth of souls is great in the sight of God'...This is a paradox of man: compared to God, man is nothing; yet we are everything to God."
I know my Heavenly Father loves me, and I love Him. And THAT'S why I'm serving a mission.
A young man, just before leaving on his mission stood in Sacrament Meeting and bore the following testimony:
Brothers and Sisters, as you know during the past few weeks I have been awaiting my mission call. During the time I was waiting, I had a dream. I knew it was not an ordinary dream. I dreamed I was in the pre-existence and was waiting my call to come to Earth.
I was filled with the same excitement and anticipation that I had before I received my mission call. In my dream, I was talking to a friend, he was a dear friend, and I felt a special closeness to him, even though I’ve never met him in this life…
As we talked, a messenger came and gave me a letter, I knew it was my call to go to Earth, in great excitement my friend and I opened the letter. I gave it to him and asked him to read aloud. The letter said:
“You have been called to Earth in a special time and a special land. You will be born into the true church, and you will have the priesthood of God in your home. You will be raised with many advantages and many blessings. You will be born in a land of plenty -a land of freedom. You will go to Earth in the United States of America.”
My friend and I rejoiced as we read my call and while we rejoiced, the messenger returned. This time he had a letter for my friend. We knew it was his call to Earth. My friend gave me the letter to read aloud. His letter said:
“You have been called to Earth in circumstances of poverty and strife. You will not be raised in the true church. Many hardships will attend your life. Your land will be raught with political and social difficulties which will hinder the work of the Lord. You will be born in Costa Rica.”
We wept, my friend and I, as we read his call. And my friend looked at me with tears in his eyes and said, “When we are down on Earth , you in your choice land and me in Costa Rica, my friend, please come and find me.”
"Then this young missionary, with tears in his own eyes said, “Brothers and Sisters, I have received my mission call, I am going to Costa Rica.”
There is a sequel to this story. About a year after the sacrament meeting, the bishop of this ward received a letter from the missionary in Costa Rica. The letter had one sheet of paper in it. And on that sheet, written in inch-high letters where four words……
“I FOUND MY FRIEND”
THIS is why I'm going on a mission. I'm not going for the exotic locations, the foreign experiences, personal development, or even the testimony building. I'm going because I want to share the gospel with others. I want others to have the temporal AND eternal blessings the gospel brings. Because of the Plan of Salvation, after I die, I can have eternal life and return to live with my Heavenly Father. Every one on this earth, who has ever lived or who will live on this earth has this divine potential. However, we must accept the gospel. What's so wonderful is how much Heavenly Father wants His children to accept the gospel. He wants us to return to live with Him! He loves us that much! He has said, "Behold, this is my work and my glory, to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39) Everything He does is meant to help us reach this divine potential. How wonderful that a being as powerful and glorious as Heavenly Father has so much love for us. And with such an individualized love! He doesn't just love the human race; He knows each one of us personally and loves us as individuals! Elder Uchtdorf said, "Even though man is nothing, it fills me with wonder and awe to think that 'the worth of souls is great in the sight of God'...This is a paradox of man: compared to God, man is nothing; yet we are everything to God."
“Oh, it is wonderful to know that our Heavenly Father loves
us—even with all our flaws! His love is such that even should we give up on
ourselves, He never will. We see ourselves in terms of yesterday and today. Our
Heavenly Father sees us in terms of forever. Although we might settle for less,
Heavenly Father won’t, for He sees us as the glorious beings we are capable of
becoming.” -Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin
A Message Meant for Me.
So
I report to the Provo MTC May 29th and in the past couple weeks, I feel I've
just been attacked by the adversary with doubts about my call, my abilities,
and my strength. Am I going to be able to learn the language? (I'm going to
Korea...) Am I going to be able to handle the missionary work? Am I
really ready to make this sacrifice? Do I have enough faith to completely hand
my life over to the Lord? I'm sure many missionaries have had similar feelings.
Anyway, last night, I got particularly down. I was so distraught over my inabilities, what I felt I would be missing by giving up 18 months, and many other things. Since it really is a choice for sisters, I was really doubting about whether I'd made the right decision. So I prayed. I asked Heavenly Father to give me something in sacrament meeting today that would help lift me back up, something that would be a little message from Him to me that I was making the right decision.
Today in sacrament meeting: After the sacrament, the first speaker to stand was an RM giving his homecoming talk. He had served in California and talked about how the Lord uses us as His instruments through the Spirit and that there are specific people who have been prepared to hear the gospel from us personally. It was a really good talk, but in my mind I was telling Heavenly Father, "Come on. We both know you can do better than this." After the RM sat down, the entire ward was asked to stand while we sang Called to Serve. Wow. Then the bishop stood. He took the stand and after welcoming the RM back, he said, "Now, I'd like to take the next few minutes to make the case that every young man should serve a mission and that every young woman should consider it." I had to stop my jaw from dropping. Oh. My. Gosh. Okay. Message received. Our bishop took the next 20 minutes to talk about experiences that had happened to him on his mission in Norway that had shown him that the Lord watches out, not only for His missionaries, but for each of us individually. The most powerful thing he said was, "The Lord calls the weak and the simple to this great and marvelous work because He knows they will trust in His strength rather than their own as they go forth with the work."
The meeting ended with I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go; the last verse resonated so strongly:
"So trusting my all to thy tender care,
And knowing thou lovest me,
I'll do thy will with a heart sincere:
I'll be what you want me to be."
For all of us with doubts who are preparing to go out, the Lord has said, "A great and marvelous work is about to come forth unto the children of men. . . Verily, verily, I say unto thee, blessed art thou for what thou hast done; for thou hast inquired of me, and behold, as often as thou hast inquired thou hast received instruction of my Spirit. . . Behold, thou knowest that thou hast inquired of me and I did enlighten thy mind; and now I tell thee these things that thou mayest know that thou hast been enlightened by the Spirit of truth; yea, I tell thee, that thou mayest know that there is none else save God that knowest thy thoughts and the intents of thy heart." (D&C 6)
All of us who have felt the desire to be missionaries are qualified! Through that desire and through the answer to our prayers we were called. The Lord qualifies those who He calls, and no matter your abilities, the Lord knows your potential is far greater than what you believe it to be. The gospel is true! And it is powerful beyond measure.
Anyway, last night, I got particularly down. I was so distraught over my inabilities, what I felt I would be missing by giving up 18 months, and many other things. Since it really is a choice for sisters, I was really doubting about whether I'd made the right decision. So I prayed. I asked Heavenly Father to give me something in sacrament meeting today that would help lift me back up, something that would be a little message from Him to me that I was making the right decision.
Today in sacrament meeting: After the sacrament, the first speaker to stand was an RM giving his homecoming talk. He had served in California and talked about how the Lord uses us as His instruments through the Spirit and that there are specific people who have been prepared to hear the gospel from us personally. It was a really good talk, but in my mind I was telling Heavenly Father, "Come on. We both know you can do better than this." After the RM sat down, the entire ward was asked to stand while we sang Called to Serve. Wow. Then the bishop stood. He took the stand and after welcoming the RM back, he said, "Now, I'd like to take the next few minutes to make the case that every young man should serve a mission and that every young woman should consider it." I had to stop my jaw from dropping. Oh. My. Gosh. Okay. Message received. Our bishop took the next 20 minutes to talk about experiences that had happened to him on his mission in Norway that had shown him that the Lord watches out, not only for His missionaries, but for each of us individually. The most powerful thing he said was, "The Lord calls the weak and the simple to this great and marvelous work because He knows they will trust in His strength rather than their own as they go forth with the work."
The meeting ended with I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go; the last verse resonated so strongly:
"So trusting my all to thy tender care,
And knowing thou lovest me,
I'll do thy will with a heart sincere:
I'll be what you want me to be."
For all of us with doubts who are preparing to go out, the Lord has said, "A great and marvelous work is about to come forth unto the children of men. . . Verily, verily, I say unto thee, blessed art thou for what thou hast done; for thou hast inquired of me, and behold, as often as thou hast inquired thou hast received instruction of my Spirit. . . Behold, thou knowest that thou hast inquired of me and I did enlighten thy mind; and now I tell thee these things that thou mayest know that thou hast been enlightened by the Spirit of truth; yea, I tell thee, that thou mayest know that there is none else save God that knowest thy thoughts and the intents of thy heart." (D&C 6)
All of us who have felt the desire to be missionaries are qualified! Through that desire and through the answer to our prayers we were called. The Lord qualifies those who He calls, and no matter your abilities, the Lord knows your potential is far greater than what you believe it to be. The gospel is true! And it is powerful beyond measure.
Sunday, February 17, 2013
For the unfortunate souls actually reading my blog...
Hello! So I got my mission call to the Korea Busan Mission on February 1, 2013. I report to the Provo Missionary Training Center on May 29, 2013. Before I report, I'll mostly be blogging in my missionary blog: sisterbonney.blogspot.com. Thought you ought to know.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Can I still jump without my appendix?
I guess one of the biggest events so far this school year was my birthday. It wasn't just a birthday. I had my first interview for my mission papers, which I think was monumental to say the least. My birthday was fun and everything. Lots of friends came by for cake and to catch up. But....
That night, I got appendicitis. Best birthday present ever. The surgery wasn't life changing. I'm short an appendix now, but that doesn't really affect me. It was the events surrounding the surgery and my recovery that forever changed me.
I had felt some pain the afternoon before, but that night, I woke up in the most intense pain I have ever experienced. (Funny moment though: the pain was so harsh that while I was asleep, it was part of my dream. And in my dream, I was in so much pain because the church authorities couldn't figure out where to send me on my mission!) Anyway, I finally woke up, found the strength to get out of my bed, and crawled out to the couch. Fortunately, one of my roommates heard me moaning and she got two of my other roommates, one of whom called my home teachers. It was 2:30 in the morning, but they came over dressed in white shirts and ties, and they gave me a simple yet powerful blessing of healing. 2:30 in the morning and they were willing to get out of bed and come help ME. I'm so grateful for the priesthood.
Afterwards, my roommate Tessa helped me out to her car, and she and another of my roommates drove me to the ER. They sat with me all night. The next morning, as I was waking up from surgery, I saw someone running down the hallway. I couldn't tell who it was at first because I didn't have my glasses on, but then the person doubled back and came into my room. It was my Relief Society president. We barely knew each other, but she had come to stay with me. She read to me, talked with me, helped me order some food, and emailed my mom about how I was doing. She didn't leave until another one of my friends came to visit. I will never forget the love that she demonstrated for me. In that moment, I realized a fraction of the love the Savior has for each one of His children.
That day, so many people visited me. Some of my old friends from last year came. My old roommates visited, and one of them came back that night to bring me Jamba Juice. My Spanish professor dropped by to give me a "get well" card! So many people who took time out of their day to serve ME, someone they had absolutely no obligation to.
Later that night, Megan, my Relief Society president, came back with a few others. She had brought the Elders Quorum President, and he and one of his friends gave me another blessing. Then, they asked me if I was hungry. I had ordered food from the hospital kitchen, but it was gross, so I didn't eat it. And I was very hungry, but I said no. Because I just hate admitting when I need things or that I'm a human being who has weaknesses, like an existing metabolism, but they wouldn't listen to me and brought me Wendy's. Which was absolutely amazing.
Later that night, my FHE family visited and brought me a card they had all signed. In the whole time I was at the hospital, not a single member of my family visited me. I'm not bitter about it or anything. In fact, I don't even mind. People have lives, and my brother didn't have ride. The point is, my FHE family came. It wasn't Monday night and most of them barely knew me, yet they took time out of their school day to make a card for me. (I later heard that they had called it the "giant card of doom". So awesome.) During the few minutes they were with me, I felt truly loved. I know that they didn't know me very well. Besides those with my roommates, none of my friendships with any of my FHE brothers or sisters blossomed into anything especially noteworthy, but during that visit, they felt like my family. That is the purpose of having FHE families for young single adults living away from their families: to have a group in which they belong for the purpose of supporting one another. In a way, FHE families are meant to fill the role of the family when the family cannot because of circumstances. During my time at the hospital, my FHE family did just that, and I'm so grateful for them.
I'm so grateful for the kindness and compassion so many showed me when I needed it. There is so much more others did for me during that time that I didn't mention, but I have not forgotten a single act of kindness that was shown to me. (I'm not just saying that. I made a list in my journal.) I was completely undeserving, yet because these people chose to demonstrate Christ-like love, whether they thought of it that way or not, I was cared for.
Mosiah 2:17 "When ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."
P.S. When I first came to BYU as a stupid little freshman, I had this fantasy that one day I would be really sick. My roommates would call my conveniently gorgeous home teachers if they could come and give me a blessing. It would be a romantic moment in which they would be my saviors. Yeah. I got my fantasy. And it was a load of crap. My home teachers were fine, but I was so sick it was kind of scary, not to mention I looked awful. Fantasies are not at all what they're cracked up to be. And there is my shallow finale.
That night, I got appendicitis. Best birthday present ever. The surgery wasn't life changing. I'm short an appendix now, but that doesn't really affect me. It was the events surrounding the surgery and my recovery that forever changed me.
I had felt some pain the afternoon before, but that night, I woke up in the most intense pain I have ever experienced. (Funny moment though: the pain was so harsh that while I was asleep, it was part of my dream. And in my dream, I was in so much pain because the church authorities couldn't figure out where to send me on my mission!) Anyway, I finally woke up, found the strength to get out of my bed, and crawled out to the couch. Fortunately, one of my roommates heard me moaning and she got two of my other roommates, one of whom called my home teachers. It was 2:30 in the morning, but they came over dressed in white shirts and ties, and they gave me a simple yet powerful blessing of healing. 2:30 in the morning and they were willing to get out of bed and come help ME. I'm so grateful for the priesthood.
Afterwards, my roommate Tessa helped me out to her car, and she and another of my roommates drove me to the ER. They sat with me all night. The next morning, as I was waking up from surgery, I saw someone running down the hallway. I couldn't tell who it was at first because I didn't have my glasses on, but then the person doubled back and came into my room. It was my Relief Society president. We barely knew each other, but she had come to stay with me. She read to me, talked with me, helped me order some food, and emailed my mom about how I was doing. She didn't leave until another one of my friends came to visit. I will never forget the love that she demonstrated for me. In that moment, I realized a fraction of the love the Savior has for each one of His children.
That day, so many people visited me. Some of my old friends from last year came. My old roommates visited, and one of them came back that night to bring me Jamba Juice. My Spanish professor dropped by to give me a "get well" card! So many people who took time out of their day to serve ME, someone they had absolutely no obligation to.
Later that night, Megan, my Relief Society president, came back with a few others. She had brought the Elders Quorum President, and he and one of his friends gave me another blessing. Then, they asked me if I was hungry. I had ordered food from the hospital kitchen, but it was gross, so I didn't eat it. And I was very hungry, but I said no. Because I just hate admitting when I need things or that I'm a human being who has weaknesses, like an existing metabolism, but they wouldn't listen to me and brought me Wendy's. Which was absolutely amazing.
Later that night, my FHE family visited and brought me a card they had all signed. In the whole time I was at the hospital, not a single member of my family visited me. I'm not bitter about it or anything. In fact, I don't even mind. People have lives, and my brother didn't have ride. The point is, my FHE family came. It wasn't Monday night and most of them barely knew me, yet they took time out of their school day to make a card for me. (I later heard that they had called it the "giant card of doom". So awesome.) During the few minutes they were with me, I felt truly loved. I know that they didn't know me very well. Besides those with my roommates, none of my friendships with any of my FHE brothers or sisters blossomed into anything especially noteworthy, but during that visit, they felt like my family. That is the purpose of having FHE families for young single adults living away from their families: to have a group in which they belong for the purpose of supporting one another. In a way, FHE families are meant to fill the role of the family when the family cannot because of circumstances. During my time at the hospital, my FHE family did just that, and I'm so grateful for them.
I'm so grateful for the kindness and compassion so many showed me when I needed it. There is so much more others did for me during that time that I didn't mention, but I have not forgotten a single act of kindness that was shown to me. (I'm not just saying that. I made a list in my journal.) I was completely undeserving, yet because these people chose to demonstrate Christ-like love, whether they thought of it that way or not, I was cared for.
Mosiah 2:17 "When ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."
P.S. When I first came to BYU as a stupid little freshman, I had this fantasy that one day I would be really sick. My roommates would call my conveniently gorgeous home teachers if they could come and give me a blessing. It would be a romantic moment in which they would be my saviors. Yeah. I got my fantasy. And it was a load of crap. My home teachers were fine, but I was so sick it was kind of scary, not to mention I looked awful. Fantasies are not at all what they're cracked up to be. And there is my shallow finale.
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Anna and the Apples
So rather than huge posts every couple months, I've decided I'm going to write shorter posts which means that it won't take so much energy to actually be unnecessarily productive as this blog fortunately requires me to be. This means moments and stories that I don't want to forget, starting with this one.
I have twin 9 yr old sisters: Anna and Miriam. I shared a hotel room with them for two weeks during the break when we first arrived in Maryland. Being in a hotel meant we got breakfast every morning. It ended at 9am. Which is ridiculous. Anyone who has ever lived with me knows that I stay up late and get up late. On the weekends, I get up at 1pm on a regular basis. And it's awesome. Unfortunately, that also meant I missed breakfast pretty much every day in the hotel.
Now, I love apples. I go through two Granny Smiths a day on a regular basis. I just love apples! The hotel served apples with breakfast. (That's important.)
The first two days in the hotel, I actually got out of bed at 8:57 to get to the breakfast room. But after that, I just stayed in bed. I figured a little hunger in the mornings was worth a few extra hours of sleep. But every morning when I finally woke up and breakfast was long over, I would find a little pile of apples on the pillow next to me. I didn't think much about it. I would eat them throughout the rest of the morning, and I never asked where they came from. No one claimed them, so I took them.
One night, Miriam, Anna, and Rebekah (my 8 yr old sister who also shared the room...and my bed) were cleaning up the room, and we started talking. Somehow we got on the subject of food. (Universally accepted conversation topic.) I mentioned how much I love apples. Anna said, "I know you love apples. That's why I've been getting them for you since you miss breakfast every morning." I was so touched! How could someone so young have the ability to serve so diligently yet so anonymously and think nothing of it? 9 years old and Anna was already observing those around her to the degree that she noticed that I liked apples. I hadn't even told her! She had just noticed me eating them with breakfast the first few mornings. What an example!!!
Christ taught us to become as little children. I believe this is merely one of the many examples of why they are so dear to Him. The whole experience really made me think about how I serve others. Am I willing to serve others just because I know it will make their lives a little easier? More importantly, am I perceptive enough to others and the Spirit to know when there is an opportunity for me to serve others? To be the Lord's hands? I hope and pray that I can see those opportunities and act on them.
I have twin 9 yr old sisters: Anna and Miriam. I shared a hotel room with them for two weeks during the break when we first arrived in Maryland. Being in a hotel meant we got breakfast every morning. It ended at 9am. Which is ridiculous. Anyone who has ever lived with me knows that I stay up late and get up late. On the weekends, I get up at 1pm on a regular basis. And it's awesome. Unfortunately, that also meant I missed breakfast pretty much every day in the hotel.
Now, I love apples. I go through two Granny Smiths a day on a regular basis. I just love apples! The hotel served apples with breakfast. (That's important.)
The first two days in the hotel, I actually got out of bed at 8:57 to get to the breakfast room. But after that, I just stayed in bed. I figured a little hunger in the mornings was worth a few extra hours of sleep. But every morning when I finally woke up and breakfast was long over, I would find a little pile of apples on the pillow next to me. I didn't think much about it. I would eat them throughout the rest of the morning, and I never asked where they came from. No one claimed them, so I took them.
One night, Miriam, Anna, and Rebekah (my 8 yr old sister who also shared the room...and my bed) were cleaning up the room, and we started talking. Somehow we got on the subject of food. (Universally accepted conversation topic.) I mentioned how much I love apples. Anna said, "I know you love apples. That's why I've been getting them for you since you miss breakfast every morning." I was so touched! How could someone so young have the ability to serve so diligently yet so anonymously and think nothing of it? 9 years old and Anna was already observing those around her to the degree that she noticed that I liked apples. I hadn't even told her! She had just noticed me eating them with breakfast the first few mornings. What an example!!!
Christ taught us to become as little children. I believe this is merely one of the many examples of why they are so dear to Him. The whole experience really made me think about how I serve others. Am I willing to serve others just because I know it will make their lives a little easier? More importantly, am I perceptive enough to others and the Spirit to know when there is an opportunity for me to serve others? To be the Lord's hands? I hope and pray that I can see those opportunities and act on them.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
New Year's Resolutions
For the first time ever, I'm actually going to write down my New Year's resolutions completely by myself. So here they are! Don't get too excited.
1. Be more consistent with my scripture study. This past semester, I did not make reading my scriptures a priority as I had in the past. Before, I had only missed around four days in three years! And it's time to get back in the habit. "Behold, I say unto you that you shall let your time be devoted to the studying of the scriptures." D&C 26:1
2. Workout at least three times a week. During fall, I got way too busy between working and a 17 credit course load to take time physically to exercise. I know it affects my mood and my confidence exponentially. I want to be happy, so I'm going to workout. I'm only taking 14 credits this semester, and I actually do love going to the gym.
3. Be more positive. Now that's just vague, but sometimes I can be a very negative person. When things get tough, I don't quit, but I do complain way too much. I don't want to be a complainer. I want to be happy! And that means making a conscious effort not to see the negative.
4. Be academically proactive. I love learning, but I like school. I hate the pressure and the deadlines and the expectations and the measuring and comparing. Perhaps most of all, I hate the forced writing. It feels like pulling teeth. I didn't do very well this semester. It wasn't because I didn't work hard or didn't do the work, but I know I could have worked harder; I could have been proactive. I could have taken my papers to TAs or reviewed my exams or anything that went beyond what was required of me.
5. Keep more regular hours. I have never kept good hours. I go to bed late, and I have to get up early for my work, so I always end up sleeping the bare minimum. That's not healthy and not good preparation for my mission. Also, I always end up running late in the mornings because I get up late, and then I have to race to school. Then, I feel like I'm late and a bad employee and don't want to go to work in the first place because it just makes me feel like a bad person. I love my job, but I hate that feeling. To be specific, I want to be in bed by midnight and up at 7am. That gives me time in the mornings to read my scriptures and grab breakfast, which I have rarely had time for before.
And I see now my explanations got progressively long winded. Anyways, I actually plan on keeping these! I think they're doable, and, as my mother would tell me, I'm plenty capable.
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